The Ocean

Last week, I was blessed to enjoy some time on the Florida coast.  We stayed in a condo that was within walking distance to the beach.  It was a fun vacation.  The kids would roll out of bed, put on their swimsuits, and head for the water.  It was their first real experience with the ocean, and they had a wonderful time playing in the water.

My favorite thing to do was to sit on the balcony of condo and watch the waves.  They're really mesmerizing.  One evening, I watched a storm roll in over the ocean, and as the sky turned dark, the waves grew in size.  I snapped lots of photos of the amazing sky over the water. It made me feel so small to look in multiple directions and see nothing but water.  

One morning, I got up early and I brewed a fresh cup of coffee.  I was being as quiet as possible, trying not to wake the kids.  I snuck out onto the balcony with my coffee and journal and stared off into the horizon.  The sunrise over the ocean was absolutely beautiful.  I must have sat there for at least an hour, just watching.  I didn't think about work.  I didn't think about my divorce.  I didn't think about any of my problems.  I just marveled at God's creation.

I felt him whisper I love you even more than this.  I looked in every direction and saw nothing but an infinite amount of water.  How is that even possible, I wondered?  From my vantage point, the ocean went on forever.  But, His love and His grace are even greater.  I don't fully understand a love like that.

I cried for a long time on that balcony.  I suppose that's a normal reaction to God's love.  I think tears are appropriate.  But, I just felt so much gratitude for my Savior.  

I wrote down a lot of things in my journal on the balcony.  The pages are still tear-stained.  One thing I wrote down was "God never agreed to give me up to my problems 24/7.  Never.  He understands the time comes when we need to work through our problems, but we weren't meant to stay focused on them all of the time.  Don't let these things overtake your mind.  You can begin to release strongholds in your mind if you set your mind on heavenly things."  

Psalm 31:3 You are my rock and my fortress; and for your names sake you lead me and guide me

Eventually, the kids woke up and joined me on the balcony.  We began our day together, and it was a wonderful day with ocean waves and families laughing.  We saw sea turtle nests.  We collected sea shells.  We nursed a few sunburns.  We fell into bed exhausted, but happy.  

I laid in bed that night, listening to the ocean waves.  Thank you, Lord, I whispered,  Your love is such an extravagant gift.